by Allyn Mitchell Evans
Donít ask me why, but I think the Universe is a friendly place. I think She loves me and will offer me wonderful gifts. Well, at some point She will. Iím still trying to figure out how to get Her full cooperation. Seems somewhat elusive at times.
Okay, Iíll be perfectly honestóI donít have a clue about how to get Her assistance. I beg, plead and bargain and still I miss opportunities or donít get what I want. Regularly, I get on my knees while trying to manipulate Her. I make demands, I throw fits and I want my way. I can act like a spoiled brat in one moment and a whimpering sobbing mess in the next. I know I donít always see the big picture nor do I understand the larger world around me. Instead, I focus on my self-centered needs, wants and desires. I wonder why stuff happens to me. I donít like being picked on, but many times still feel that way. Why did my computer crash? Why did my grandmother die? Itís my little world and I feel rocked often.
Then, one day, my perception of the Universe changed. A couple of weeks before Christmas, I was watching my six-year-old daughter in her failed attempt to manipulate me. She was begging, pleading and even trying to bargain with me. I was not having any part of it. None. In my superior view, I saw what she couldnít see. I knew that she already had everything she wanted. It simply wasnít time yet. Hiding my smile, I knew Santa planned to deliver it all.
The day before Christmas, she was playing with a cousin. The cousin picked up a toy and banged her on the head for no reason. She cried and screamed in pain and came running to me, ďWhy? Why did he do it, Mom?Ē I didnít have an answer. I knew that in the grand scheme of things it wasnít that big of a deal. The poor boy was probably frustrated as hell, and well, did what he knew to do to get his needs met. Thatís all. There was no imbedded meaning. It just happened.
A couple of days after Christmas, her greed in full swing, my daughter demanded more toys. Again, viewing her temper tantrum from a higher place, I knew that she had all she needed right now, did not need more and the only answer to give her was, ďNo.Ē She didnít want to hear it. Got mad and sulked.
On New Yearís Day, my toy-focused daughter started talking about her impending birthday. ďMom, can I have the new My Little Pony?Ē In my all-knowing way I said, ďOf course, you can have anything you want. Itís just a matter of focusing. Letís wait until itís time for your birthday and see what you really want at that time.Ē She took it well and I felt omnipotent.
Then it hit me. The Universe is my Mother.
Mississippi born Allyn Evans is a freelance writer and author residing in Oklahoma with her husband and seven-year-old daughter. Upon completion of her MBA, Allyn worked in higher education and the nonprofit sectors. Later she founded a rťsumť and career consulting business, which gave her the opportunity to stay at home with her daughter. Following her daughterís first day of school, Allyn transitioned from rťsumť and career consulting to nonfiction writer and hasnít looked back. Already working on her second book titled: Queen Power, Evans interviewed over 50 women to gather insight and stories.
Read another story by Allyn Evans: It's Good To Be Queen!
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