Southern stories, humor, travel, news, links, poetry, personal essays, memoirs, and lots more. No bells and whistles, just good reading.

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Home - I Home - II Articles Links Stories from the Press Snippets Message Board Editor's Bio Bulletin Board Submissions Free Update E-mail Link to USADS USADS BACK ISSUES May~2003 Jun~2003 Jul~2003 Aug~2003 Sep~2003 Oct~2003 Nov~2003 Dec~2003 Jan~2004 Feb~2004 Mar~2004 Apr~2004 SNIPPETS By Beth Jacks Click the link for more info. USADS ~ SOUTHERN PEOPLE AND PLACES . . . AND ANYTHING ELSE WE FANCY! One of the best sites on the Net for readers, writers, storytellers, travelers, nostalgia buffs, and gossips. Southern Talk "We were used to staying at the Edgewater Gulf, a wonderful hotel between Gulfport and Biloxi. Its grounds were ample. I remember a cool lobby of gently turning ceiling fans, plants in white recesses, and rooms designed each with a long entrance passage facing on the sea, drawing a constant breeze through latticed doors." -- Elizabeth Spencer "If you’re a person mosquitoes love to bite, you may or may not want to know it’s because of your body odor. Somehow the way you smell turns them on." -- Dorothy Shawhan "Driving in, I felt the bottom of my car scrape the road; it was extremely rough, the ruts deep and filled with holes. 'Good God,' I said to Josh, 'you’d think a Nobel Prize winner could afford to care for his driveway!' Josh said he thought Faulkner left it that way in order to discourage visitors. 'As a matter of fact,' he continued, 'I wouldn’t be surprised if he dug the holes in it himself.'" -- P. D. East “My advice to young people joining the coaching ranks is three-fold: first, get yourself some good ear-plugs; second, buy an answering machine to screen your calls; and third, practice counting to ten . . . over and over and over . . .” -- Sank Powe "It costs so much to write a decent sentence." -- Maya Angelou “Writing is a way for me of discovering what I think about something. I think that’s the great delight in writing." -- Peter Taylor "Don’t be a blueprint – be an original." -- Roy Acuff "The only artful way to fix string beans is to cook them almost to death." -- Ludlow Porch "This is the South I knew as a child. Swamp and palmetto and ‘sinks’ and endless stretches of pines slashed and dripping their richness into little tin cups that glint like bright money. Twisting sand roads . . . warm soft sand that you play in; quicksand in which you die.” -- Lillian Smith "The South, one might say, is a tree with many age rings, with its limbs and trunk bent and twisted by all the winds of the years, but with its tap root in the Old South." -- W. J. Cash "To this day Southerners acknowledge a more far-flung kin network . . . than people in other regions of the United States." -- Carl N. Degler "Southerners are generally polite and unpretentious; perhaps it’s too hot to be otherwise." -- Blanche McCrary Boyd "A mule can climb a tree if it’s in love." -- Barry Hannah “Long before I wrote stories, I listened for stories.” -- Eudora Welty "Daddy always says if you give a man a white shirt and a tie and a suit of clothes, you can find out real quick how sorry he is." -- Harry Crews “A fair amount of what’s wrong with the world on any particular day . . . is apt to be somebody’s unwillingness to experience something he’s never experienced before.” -- Steve Yarbrough “Courage is contagious. When a brave man takes a stand, the spines of others are stiffened.” -- Billy Graham "It was common, acceptable, not to be able to read, but a man who wouldn’t fight, couldn’t fight, was a pathetic thing. To be afraid was shameful. I’m not saying I agree with it. It’s just the way it was." -- Rick Bragg “The kind of thing I’m good at is knowing every politician in the state and remembering where he itches. And I know where to scratch him.” -- Earl Long "I am convinced there is only one place where there is no laughter . . . and that’s hell." -- Jerry Clower "It’s easy to hear the earthiness in most Memphis music; it’s sucked up so much richness from the soil, been watered by the sweat of so many hard-living Delta blues artists." -- Stephanie Zacharek “Lips are all meat. No gristle, no bone, no nothing. They’re bar food, hot and vinegary, great with a beer.” -- Lionel Dufour “The Moonpie is more than a snack. It is a cultural artifact.. -- William Ferris Comments? Questions? Suggestions? Click here! ~Southern Speak~ “Pukish” ~~nauseated~~ “When I saw that possum smashed to goodness in the middle of the road, I just felt right pukish.” For more great Southern expressions, please click here. @2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 All Rights Reserved Best viewed on IE Updated May/04 All work at USADS is the property of the authors. Please respect copyright. For permission to reprint, contact writers directly or e-mail USADS Editor.

~May '04 Featured Articles~ Enjoy our May feature stories! _________________________ Mama by Claude Jones Mother’s Day special! Claude introduces us to his feisty mom. You won’t forget her. A Double Jack with a Sidecar by David Norris Another tribute to mom. David remembers his mother, and once again, he mesmerizes us with his words. Earworms by Newt Harlan Newt’s got ‘em too – those tunes that won’t leave his head. Great storyteller, this Newt fellow. A Writer’s Bad Backhand by Charles W. Dowdy Read why Dowdy’s such a pitiful tennis player . . . and prepare to grin. Charles Dowdy never disappoints us at USADS. We love him! My Pet Fat inspires inventor wannabe by Beth Boswell Jacks Jacks wants to invent something and make lots of money. She’s got an idea and she shares it. Ye Editor thinks Jacks is funny ‘cause Jacks IS Ye Editor. Well, get over it. How To Eat Crawfish by Jane Riley USADS readers have been waiting for this, and here ‘tis. Nobody can explain it better than Jane. A golf club for Levi by Gene Owens Takes a clever grandson to teach ol’ Gene a thing or two about the game of golf, don’t you know. Gene always gives us a chuckle! The Fishing Trip by Gene G. Goodson And this from another Gene: This is one of those kinds of “trips” that continues to bring back fond memories . . . sort of. Gene Goodson can flat tell a tale. Book review: The Amateur Marriage by Anne Tyler Reviewed by Augusta Russel Scattergood Gusty's back with another review that will send readers straight to their closest bookstore. Anne Tyler is one of the best . . . and this book will captivate. The Name Game – Southern Style by Lonnye Sue Sims Pearson Lonnye Sue expounds on the Southern affinity for double names. She’s got a list a mile long. Naming a new baby? Come see. Grammar Schlammar by Melanie McCranie Mansfield Stop the presses! Here’s Lonnye Sue’s beautiful daughter Melanie . . . and she’s as talented as her mama. Funny, too! With the right tools, y’all too can grow your own grits by Bill Melton He’s not kidding, right? Ye Editor has always wondered where grits come from. Excellent grits primer for Yankees, Bill’s written here. Little Girl Again by Brenda Parris Sibley Brenda shares with us another beautiful poem she wrote as she cared for her ill mother. Many will identify. Thank you, Brenda, for these thoughts of an Alzheimer’s caregiver. Hanging out with the Brotherhood at the IHOP by Ed Williams Boys will be boys. Ed will tell the rest -- what a crazy guy! Aether Dreams by Aamie Burnley Aamie invites us to wander with her. Readers, you must! Aamie's poems are not to be missed. Phil Bratcher’s Poetry by Rev. Phil Bratcher More wonderful poems from the Reverend. Few words. Fascinating thoughts. Mississippi Poems by Avis Corley Porter Avis is a proud Mississippian – her poems are evidence of that. The State should put her on the payroll, for sure. Chevrolet SSR by Tom Givens A USADS favorite we call Judge Tom Givens tells us all about his new ride and celebrity status. He’ll have you out truck shopping. In the morning. Jackie White: A Talented Friend by Jackie K. Cooper Cooper gives us a book review and more as he tells of his friend Jackie White, writer extraordinaire! To the Co-op by Eva Braswell What did we do before electricity? Eva is in her 80s, and she remembers. Read this poem she penned back in the 50s. Clever verse! Crossed Up by Bill Fullerton What happens when three fools set out on a mission to burn a cross in a lawyer’s yard? Bill Fullerton uses his skill with words to give us the picture. Another terrific short story from Fullerton. Flatlands by Susan Sims Moody Meet characters from Moody’s book, Flatlands. Moody truly captures the Mississippi Delta, a most captivating place to capture. ________________________ And why not enjoy these "oldies but goodies" from May ’03? The Most Marvelous Southern Pageant Ever by Lonnye Sue Pearson Sweet Dirt and Southern Bones by Cindy Brown President Bush, Sponge Bob, and a Banana by Charles Dowdy Ambulance Drivers Are Not Perfect by Kent Fletcher The Delta Theater by Tom Givens Highway Divas: Ike Turner by Beth B. Jacks Texas and the Deep South by Randy Hill Oven-fried Chicken . . . and More by Eddie Draper Louise Shaffer's The Three Miss Margarets by Augusta R. Scattergood Ah Love Mah Frens ‘n Bite Mah Enemies by Tattoo and G. Goodson But You Know What I Mean! by Robert Fulton

Southern stories, humor, travel, news, links, poetry, personal essays, memoirs, and lots more. No bells and whistles, just good reading.