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ON THE BUS
by Anonymous



Note from a USADS reader/writer: "Here's a story that my mama and her good friend A.D. wrote together about their senior trips with the First Baptist Church. They want to be listed as 'Anonymous' because . . . who knows? The names in the story were changed so nobody would be embarassed, but the events in the story as related here are true."


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ANONYMOUS WRITES:

This is just an old white bus with old people on it. Thank goodness for our senior citizen program in our church. We've been many places and seen many sights since the program started; otherwise we wouldn't have had all the fun of reminiscing about it. And our driver started driving when he was a young man and now he's a senior citizen, too.

How can we forget the time the bus was loading up, and Vera's husband (along with the preacher) was checking the tires? John, Vera's husband went round and round checking the tires, as did the preacher. Finally, all was ready and Vera raised her window and looked down at the kneeling figure and said, "Bye, honey, I love you." To her embarassment, the bent figure raised up and she saw the preacher's face instead of John's. But the preacher didn't mind.

On one trip to a big convention, my better-half almost got in a fight. (Really now, at his age!) Well, he was saving seats for us, and a big fellow said, "You can't save those seats," and the better-half said, "Just try me!" Also, as my sister and I were leaving, she balanced herself on my husband's arm. One little lady stopped me and said, "Watch out for her--she's trying to catch your husband."

We've had some wonderful characters on our trips. Two sweet little ladies were walking together when one (a little deaf) said to the other (a little deaf, too), "Sally, do you belong to the DAR?" The other replied, "You know I'm an Episcopalian."

Snacks are always passed around on our trips and one sweet lady always cleans up our mess when we return to base. There are losses, too, and she tries to return to the owners items such as earrings, sweaters, umbrellas, etc.

Sometimes our preachers go along with us. They are fun loving, too, but one who went along was a fellow we'd always thought was a very solemn fellow. He proved us wrong. Some of our seatmates had to stop often for a bathroom visit. So when we got back, the preacher said, "I want you all to have an urinalysis." But he was usually the first off the bus when we stopped.

We try to keep up with our luggage but once we were so excited to get away that one lady forgot to take her luggage from her car trunk -- but that didn't put a damper on her trip. She just bought some new outfits when we stopped in the next city.

Sometimes there are little accidents on a trip -- like sprained ankles, etc., but there are always good souls to help.

Our driver (bless him) is "cool." He "never loses it" even when the fuel pump goes out or our luggage trailer brakes come loose and roll down a hill, 'spillin' our duds.

Long may he drive!

Sincerely,
A Rider

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Read many more great stories listed on our USADS memoir pages.

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